Everything in Moderation...?

Often in the food world, I'll hear or see the phrase "in moderation."  Examples: "Have pizza, but in moderation."  "Use butter, but in moderation."  "You can eat anything, as long as it's in moderation."  For many years, "in moderation" was my adage to live by; in essence, it was my battle cry to shield myself against any self-doubts about the food that I chose to put in my body.  But once I started to rethink my food choices, I became disgusted with my use of the phrase.  In my mind, it was a cop out -- a tool used to justify any food decisions I made.  A bagel for breakfast?  Fine, because it was in moderation.  A sandwich on white bread with pretzels for a side?  That seemed to be in moderation, or at least pretty standard.  Stacey's pita chips and hummus?  Definitely fine since it was "healthy" and in moderation.  Dessert and a margarita?  A splurge, but not something that I did every night, so it had to be moderation.  Right?  It wasn't until last summer that I realized my "moderate" choices added up to adversely affect my health.  Plus, these food options were highly processed/refined with little true nutritional value.  All of a sudden, I couldn't hide behind the expression: I was now exposed and I had to deal with the reality that "in moderation" was merely my excuse to eat whatever I wanted.  There was nothing "moderate" about it at all.  So, I chucked "in moderation" out the window, and decided to strive to eat food in its most natural state.  For me, it was a liberating moment and I finally felt released from my carbo-holic ways.

Recently, however, I had a conversation with two friends, both who follow a Paleo diet.  One made a comment about how she will eat "in moderation."  I stopped in my tracks, turned with my mouth agape, and asked her to clarify.  But before I even gave her a chance to speak, I did a complete word vomit on why I hated the phrase.  My comments were well-received, but I finally gave my friend a chance to talk.  It turned out that her definition of "moderation" was far more conservative than mine.  For my friend, "moderation" was eating healthy most days, and indulging in the occasion splurge (although she confessed, it was sometimes more than occasional).  Still, she's a fabulous athlete, in great shape, and eats a diet based on protein, nuts, fruits, and veggies, so I realized this motto truly worked for her.  We agreed to disagree. 

So, my question is: is "in moderation" a phrase to live by or a cop out to eat what you want?