Vices

This weekend, I had a fabulous time with my sister and husband as we visited dear friends, and enjoyed delicious, home cooked meals and lots and lots of vino.  Steak, kale salad, peach cardamom pie, blueberries muffins, pico de gallo and corn chips, sharp cheddar cheese... yum.  It was a weekend of savory, delicious food, and when I got home, I discovered my weight was up five pounds from my last weight check a week ago.  Perhaps it wasn't smart of me to hop on the scale so quickly, especially since I knew my body would be in flux, but it's certainly got me thinking about eating.
While I definitely don't regret any of the foods I ate this weekend (gluten included), especially since most of it was organic, fresh, and natural, I know I consumed to excess.  But once in awhile, is it OK to break out of the routine?

I've had several people comment that my "gross looking" fish and chips picture looked really delicious to them.  So, I figured it was time to be honest about my vices (although a conversation about what warrants a vice must be had eventually).  So, here goes:

Dense, fudgy, chocolate brownies:

Coffee Oreo Ice Cream (preferably from JP Licks):

Or just Oreos in general:

Cupcakes, specifically from Treat:

And sometimes, fresh bread or the like:

Clearly, I have a preference for the savory, sugary, and decadent.  So yeah, fried fish doesn't do it for me, but in my opinion, chocolate's where it's at.  I'm currently salivating.

But I just don't always know where to draw the line of when these treats are acceptable cheats.  Is the Greek yogurt I eat in the morning a cheat?  Or the banana I had with peanut butter today?  Is the feta I'll eat with dinner?  If so, can and should the above pictured treats be a part of my diet?   How often?  Or should I try to find ways to make these treats primal friendly?  Or do I throw that out the window and have a gluten-filled brownie?

Well, I do eat these foods -- the savory, sugary treats included.  Pie last Saturday, cake a week ago -- I do indulge.  And yes, I feel a twinge of guilt.  In part, this guilt comes from the blog -- if I am claiming why eating clean is the best thing since sliced bread, I probably shouldn't eat that bread, right?  I'm also terrified of gaining weight (again).  This is the longest I've stuck to an exercise/food plan as an adult, and I'm freaked that I'll fart it all away in a second.  I probably won't, but the fear is paralyzing, and who knows?  I also feel that I'm the kind of girl who looks at food and gains weight.  I watch others around me enjoying Coke and burgers, and while I have a new found sense of smugness, I still have a bit of jealousy.  Man, we had a cupcake bar at work last week, and it was a struggle to resist eating one.  (I did resist; in part because I reminded myself I'd be eating very well over the weekend).  I try to remind myself that I am making good food choices for my health, but I find it hard not to have my weight as a cognizant factor in my decisions to change my food and exercise plans.  Plus, I'm vain and I want to look good -- although I still have a ways to go, I'm definitely in the best shape I've ever been.  I also cognitively know that people who look great exercise frequently and eat clean.  And yes, I understand that body fat is way more important than a silly BMI.  But I'd be lying if I didn't admit that body issues inevitably creep in.

So, I guess I'm still on the never ending quest for balance in my diet, and understanding what balance means.  What is a "cheat" food?  What should my (and your) relationship with food be?

What's your balance?  How do you approach cheat foods?